第01集
上半部分
Joey: I’m telling you that girl totally winked at me.
- 那个女孩一定在跟我使眼色。
All: Did not, she did not wink at you…
- 她才没有
Chandler: Huh.
- 哈。
Ross: I have to say Tupelo Honey by Van Morrison.
- 我会认为是范莫里森的“土波罗蜜”。
Rachel: Nooo Way! The most romantic song ever was The Way We Were.
- 不会吧!我会认为 最浪漫的曲子是“往日情怀”。
Phoebe: Uh, see, I-I think that one that Elton John wrote for, um, that guy on Who’s The Boss.
- 嗯,我觉得是艾尔顿约翰为连续剧《妙管家》里的家伙写的歌。
Rachel: What song was that, Pheebs?
- 那是什么歌,菲比?
Phoebe: Hold me close, young Tony Dan-za.
- 抱紧我,年轻的汤尼丹佐。
Phoebe: Hi Monica! Hey Mon! Hey Mon!
- 嗨,莫妮卡!- 嗨,莫妮卡!-嗨,莫妮卡!
Phoebe: Oh my God, has she slept at all?
- 天啊,她到底有没有睡觉?
Ross: Nope.
- 没有。
Rachel: No, it’s been three nights in a row.
- 没有,已经连续三个晚上了。
Ross: Yeah, she finally stopped crying yesterday, but then she found one of Richard’s cigar butts out on the terrace, so.
- 从昨天起,她终于不哭了,但是她又在阳台发现理查抽过的雪茄,所以。
Phoebe: Oh, ok, that explains it. I got a call at two in the morning, but all I could hear was, like, this high squeaky sound, so I thought oh, ok so it’s like a mouse or a opossum.
- 哦,好吧,这说明了为何我在清晨两点接到一通电话,而我只能听到一些吱吱的声音,我就想“一定是老鼠或负鼠”。
Then, I realized, like, ok where would a mouse or a opossum get the money to make the phone call.
- 然后我就想,好吧,老鼠或负鼠怎么会有钱打电话呢?
Chandler: Morning. Morning, hey, you made pancakes?
- 早安。-早啊,嘿,你做了松饼啊?
Chandler: Yeah, like there’s any way I could ever do that.
- 是啊,你还以为我真的会做呢。
Janice: Monica and Rachel had syrup, uh-uh, now I can get my man to cheer up. Good morning Joey.
- 莫妮卡和瑞秋有糖浆,我可以让我的男人开心了。早安,乔伊。
Joey: Good morning.
- 早安。
Janice: Ooh someone’s wearing grumpy pants.
- 有人穿着坏脾气的裤子哦。
Chandler: Gotta be you man. I’m wearing smarty pants.
- 那一定说的是你,我穿着傲慢无礼的裤子。
Janice: Ok here we go. One, two, and here is my chance to give you a third one. Joey?
- 好了,开始了,一,二,侥幸给你第三个。乔伊?
Joey: No no. I’ll just have juice.
- 不,不。我只喝果汁就行了。
Chandler: Hey, you know what, here’s a thought. Why don’t you stay home from work today and just hang out with me.
- 嘿,我有个想法。你干脆别去上班,跟我在一起就好了。
Janice: Oh, I wish. Listen, honey, you have that report to finish, and I’ve gotta go see my lawyer.
- 是啊,但愿如此你有报告要做,而我得去见律师。
Chandler: I can not believe I am going out with someone that is getting divorced. I’m such a grown-up. Joey, hey, go to your room!
- 我真不敢相信我竟跟要离婚的女生约会。我真像个大人。乔伊,嘿,回你的房间!
Joey: Chandler, hey, up yours!
- 钱德,嘿,去你的!
Janice: I-I-I gotta go, I gotta go. Ok, not without a kiss.
- 我我我要走了,我要走了。好了,给我个吻才能走。
Chandler: Well, maybe I won’t kiss you, and then you’ll have to stay.
- 或者我就不亲你,这样你就会留下来。
Joey: Kiss her! Kiss her!
- 亲她!快亲她!
Janice: I’ll see you later, sweetie. Bye Joey.
- 晚点见,甜心。再见,乔伊。
Joey: Bye bye Janice. So when ya dumping her? Nope, not this time.
- 再见,珍妮丝。那么你什么时候要甩掉她?-不会,这次不会了。
Joey: Come on, quit yanking me.
- 拜托,别整我了。
Chandler: I’m not yanking you.
- 我没有整你。
Joey: This is Janice.
- 这个是珍妮丝。
Chandler: Yeah, I know. She makes me happy.
- 对,我知道。她让我很愉快。
Joey: Ok. All right. You look me in the eye and tell me, without blinking, that you’re not breaking up with her. No blinking.
- 好,你看着我的眼睛,告诉我,不眨眼睛,说你不会跟她分手。别眨眼睛。
Chandler: I’m not breaking up with her!
- 我不会跟她分手!
Monica: God, look what I found in the drain.
- 天啊,你看我在排水管里发现什么?
Rachel: What?
- 什么?
Monica: It’s some of Richard’s hair! What do I do with this?
- 这些是理查的头发!我该拿这些怎么办?
Ross: Getting it away from me would be job one.
- 第一件事就是把它从我身边拿开。
Monica: It’s weird, but you know what I don’t wanna throw this away. I mean this is like all I have left of him, gross, drain hair. Ooh!
- 奇怪,但我并不想把它丢掉。这些是我仅有的,属于他的东西,恶心的、排水管的头发。哦!
Phoebe: Ooh. Oh. Looks like, like a tiny little person drowning in your cereal.
- 哦。哦。真好玩,好像有一个小人,在你的麦片里淹死了。
Monica: God, what is wrong with me.
- 天,我是怎么了?
Ross: You need to get some sleep. I need to get some Richard.
- 你需要一些睡眠。-我需要的是理查。
Rachel: Monica, you broke up with him for a reason.
- 莫妮卡,你跟他分手是有原因的。
Monica: I know, I know. I’m just so tired of-of missing him. I’m tired of wondering why hasn’t he called. Why hasn’t he called?
- -我知道,我知道。我只是不想再这么想他。不愿再去想,他为何不打来?他为何都没打来?
Phoebe: Maybe, ‘cause you told him not to?
- 可能因为你叫他别再打来?
Monica: What are you, the memory woman?
- 你到底是什么?记忆女王吗?
Joey: They’re not breaking up. Chandler and Janice. They’re not breaking up. He didn’t blink or anything.
- 他们不会分手。我是说钱德和珍妮丝。他们不会分手。他的眼睛连眨一下都没有。
Rachel: Well, you know I’m not surprised. I mean have you seen them together, they’re really cute. Cute? This is Janice! You remember Janice?
- 我一点也不惊讶。你看过他们在一起的样子吗?他们真的好可爱。-“可爱?”那可是珍妮丝!你记得珍妮丝吗?
Rachel: Yes, Joey, I remember, she’s annoying, but you know what she’s-she’s his girlfriend now. I mean what can we do?
- 是的,乔伊,我记得啊,她很惹人厌,但是你知道吗?她现在是他的女朋友。那我们能怎么办?
Joey: There you go! That’s the spirit I’m looking for! What can we do? Huh? All right who’s first? Huh? Ross?
- 这就对了!我就是要这种精神 “我们能怎么办?”好,谁先来?罗斯?
Ross: Well I’m thinking Chandler’s our friend and Janice makes him happy, so I say we all just be adult about it and accept her.
- 钱德是我们的朋友,而珍妮丝能让他快乐,所以我们就成熟点,接受她。
Joey: Yeah, we’ll call that Plan B.All right? Come on people, we need some inspiration!
- 这个先归类在B计划。如何?拜托,我们需要些妙计!
Phoebe: Yeah, ok. All right, you want a plan? Here we go, all right. So umm ok Ross, you go into the air duct and disable the alarm, ok?
- 好吧,你需要计划?这样那么,罗斯,你爬进排气管,不要触动警报,好吗剩下的交给我们,放下绳子就行了。
And you know the rest of us will just rappel down ropes. We’re in and out in ten minutes and disappear into the night. Huh, huh?
- 我们要在十分钟之内进去出来。然后消失在夜色中。好吗?
Rachel: Honey, I was wondering…Hmm?
- 甜心,我在想啊-嗯哼?
Rachel: Do you still have that, um, navy uniform?
- 你那套海军制服还在吗?
Ross: Nooo, I had to return it to the costume place. Hmm.
- 不,我拿去戏服店还了。-嗯。
Ross: I think I have an old band uniform from high school.
- 我还有一套高中乐团的旧制服。
Rachel: You remember not having sex in high school, right? Yeah.
- 你记得高中时不能做爱吧?-是啊。
Rachel: Well honey, what about you? What? I mean, fun, you know, fantasy type things?
- 甜心,那么你呢?-啥?-你有任何有趣的幻想吗?
Ross: No.
- 没。
Rachel: Come on you gotta have one!
- 别这样,你一定有!
Ross: Nope.
- 没有。
Rachel: Ross, you know what? What?
- 罗斯,你知道吗?-啥?
Rachel: If you tell me, I might do it.
- 如果你跟我说,或许我会帮你实现。
Ross: Ok, umm. Did you ever see, um, Return Of The Jedi?
- 好啊。你有没有看过《星球大战》的《绝地大反攻》?
Rachel: Yeah.
- 看过。
Ross: Do you remember the scene with, um, Jabba the Hut? He was this uh…really fat worm guy.
- 你记不记得那场戏,当赫特族的贾霸出现时?他真是个胖胖的虫子怪物。
Rachel: Wow, men and women really are different.
- 哇哦,男人和女人的兴趣果然不一样。
Ross: No no no see Jabba had, as his prisoner, um, Princess Leia.
- 不,不,不。贾霸带着他的囚犯,莉亚公主。
Rachel: Oooh!
- 哦!
Ross: Princess Leia, was wearing this, um, gold bikini thing. It was pretty cool.
- 莉亚公主穿着,金色的比基尼。那样子很好看。
Rachel: So are you saying you would like me to um…dress up like Princess Leia, in a gold bikini?
- 所以你是说你想让我打扮成莉亚公主,穿着金色的比基尼?
Ross: Ok!
- 好啊!
Phoebe: Yeah, oh, Princess Leia and the gold bikini, oh, every guy our age loved that.
- 莉亚公主穿金色比基尼,哦,我们这年纪的男人都很喜欢。
Rachel: Really! Um, um.
- 真的吗?-嗯,嗯。
Rachel: It’s huge. Yeah, that’s the moment, when-when, you know she stopped being a princess, and she became, you know, like, a woman, you know.
- 很重要的。那个时刻,她不再是个公主,她变成了,一个女人。
Did you ever do the-the Leia thing?
- 你曾扮过莉亚公主吗?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, um-mm. Oh!
- 哦,是的,嗯哼。哦!
Rachel: Really? That-that great huh?
- 真的吗?有那么棒啊?
Phoebe: No it’s just that I got this new pager and I have it on vibrate. See ya!
- 不,只是我买了新的传呼机,我把它调成“震动”。再见!
Ross: Hey!
- 嘿!
Rachel: Hi you guys!
- 你们好啊!
Ross: Look who I found standing outside the Szechuan Dragon staring at a parking meter.
- 你看我在四川龙餐厅外找到谁了?她盯着停车收费表看。
Rachel: Mon. Hi! Hi.
- 嘿,莫妮卡!-嘿。
Rachel: Why aren’t you at work? Oh, they-they sent me home.
- 你怎么没去上班?-哦,他们他们把我送回家了。
Rachel: Why?
- 为什么?
Monica: Because I don’t work at the Szechuan Dragon.
- -因为我并不是在四川龙餐厅上班。
Ross: Ok.
- -好的。
Rachel: You really, really need to get some sleep, honey. I know I do.
- 你真的,真的需要睡一下,甜心。-我知道。
Ross: Hi. Hi.
- 嘿。-嘿。
Ross: Guess what? What?
- 你猜怎么着?-啥?
Ross: They published my paper. Oh, really?
- 有人要出版我的论文。-哦,真的吗?
Ross: Yeah, Statistical Deviations In the Carbon Dating of Fossilized Algae colon History or Mystery?
- 是的,藻类化石的碳定年法误差统计:历史还是神秘?
Phoebe: Rach, look! Oh, hi! Where is my strong Ross Skywalker to come rescue me. There he is.
- 瑞秋,你看!我那强壮的罗斯天行者何时会来拯救我?他来了。
Joey: Fortune! This guy is so stupid. It’s Count Rushmore! !
- -哦!-这个家伙好笨。是“拉什莫尔伯爵”!!
Chandler: You know, you should really go on this show. All right, listen, I got three tickets to the Rangers tonight. What’d you say?
- 你真的该去参加这个节目。好了,听着,我有三张今晚巡游者队的票。你觉得如何?
Joey: I say, ‘I am there!’ Cool! Aw, is Ross going to? No, Janice.
- 我会说,我一定去!太棒了!哦,罗斯也会去吗?-不,是珍妮丝。
Joey: Jan-ice. ‘Cause I, just, I feel bad for Ross, you know, we-we always go together, we’re like the three way out on a limb here, but do you, do you, have a problem with Janice?
- 珍妮丝?因为我会替罗斯难过,你知道吗?我们总是一起去的,我们是曲棍球三兄弟啊,我可能误会你了,但你是否不喜欢珍妮丝?
Joey: No, Yeeees. God, how do I say this. Uh…Oh, hi, you know that girl from the Greek restaurant with the hair?
- 没有,对啦。天啊,我该怎么说?哦,嘿,你知道希腊餐厅里,那个头发很蓬的女孩子?
Chandler: Ooh, that girl that I hate, eww, drives me crazy, eww, eww, oh!
- 哦,那个我很讨厌的女孩子?她快把我逼疯了。
Joey: Look, I don’t hate Janice, she’s-she’s just a lot to take, you know.
- 听着,我不讨厌珍妮丝,只是她令人难以忍受。
Chandler: Well, there you go.
- 你说出来了吧。
Joey: Oh, hey. Come on man, don’t look at me like that, she used to drive you nuts before too, remember?
- 哦,行了。别那样看着我,以前她也快把你逼疯了,记得吗?
Chandler: Well, I’m crazy about her now. I think this could be the Real Thing. Capital ‘R’! Capital ‘T’! Don’t worry, those are the right letters.
- 但是我现在为她疯狂,这次可能是真的,我是说“真的”!别担心,我说的字母是对的。
Joey: Look, what do you want me to say?
- 你到底要我说什么?
Chandler: I want you to say that you like her!
- 我要你说你喜欢她!
Joey: I can’t. Like her!
- 我不能。
Joey: No.
- -喜欢她!-不。
Chandler: So you’re not even gonna try?
- 你甚至不想尝试?
Joey: What’s the point? It’s like this chemical thing, you know.
- 关键是什么?就像化学反应,知道吗。
下半部分
Joey: Every time she starts laughing, I just wanna pull my arm off just so I have something to throw at her.
- 每次她一开始笑,我就想把我的手臂拔下来,然后往她身上砸。
Chandler: Thanks for trying. Oh, and by the way there is no Count Rushmore!
- 谢谢你的努力。对了,根本就没有拉什莫尔伯爵!
Joey: Yeah, then-then who’s the guy that painted the faces on the mountain?
- 那个在拉什莫尔山上化妆假扮总统的人是谁?
Ross: How could you’ve told her? Ross, I didn’t think it would that big a deal.
- 你怎么可以告诉她?-罗斯,我想又没什么大不了的。
Ross: Oh, she didn’t think it would be that big a deal.
- 哦,她认为没什么大不了的。
Rachel: Ok, who are you talking to when you do that?
- 哈,你这样子是在跟谁讲话?
Ross: Look, that was supposed to be like a private, personal thing between us.
- 这些应该是我们之间,很私密的对话。
Rachel: Ok, Ross, Phoebe is my girl friend, ok? We tell each other everything.
- 好吧,罗斯,菲比是我的女性好友,好吗?我们无话不谈的。
You know, I mean, come on, guys do the same thing, I mean, what about all that locker room stuff.
- 得了,男人也一样啊。那些更衣室里的对话呢?
Ross: That’s different, ok. That’s like, uh ‘Who dated a stripper?’ or ‘Who did it on the back of the Staten Island Ferry?’
- 那又不一样了,我们会谈像是谁跟脱衣舞娘约会或谁在史坦顿岛渡轮的后舱做爱?
Rachel: Were both of those Joey? Yeah. Look, you don’t, you don’t talk about like, you know, your girlfriend and the intimate stuff you, you do with her.
- 这两个都是乔伊吧?-是的。但是不会谈女朋友,还有你们之间亲密的事。
Rachel: Not even with your best friend. Noo!
- 连最好的朋友也不谈?-不谈!
Rachel: That is so sad. You’re missing out so much, Ross. I mean, the bonding and the sharing, you know. And-and knowing that someone else is going through the same thing you are.
- 真可悲啊。你们错过太多乐趣了,罗斯,那是种互相连结与分享的感觉。并知道他们也和你经历过一样的事。
Ross: Hmph. So what, you, you tell each other everything?
- 那,你们什么都跟对方说吗?
Rachel: Pretty much.
- 差不多啊。
Ross: Did you talk about the night of five times? Do you tell people about the night of five times?
- 你们有没有谈过一夜五次的纪录?你有没有告诉她们那次一夜五次的纪录?
Rachel: Uh, honey, yeah that was with Carol.
- 甜心,你那次是跟卡萝。
Ross: I know, but it’s still worth mentioning, I think.
- 我知道,我想还是值得一提。
Phoebe: Relax every muscle in your body. Listen to the plinky plunky music.
- 全身肌肉放松。听着叮叮咚咚的音乐好。
Ok, now close you eyes, and think of a happy place. Ok, tell me your happy place.
- 好的,现在闭上你的眼睛,想一个很愉快的地方。告诉我让你快乐的地方是哪里。
Monica: Richard’s living room, drinking wine.
- 理查家的客厅,一起喝酒。
Phoebe: All right. No, no, no, not a Richard thing, just put down the glass. And get out!
- 不,不,不,不可以跟理查有关,把酒杯放下。快出来!
Monica: Sorry, but that’s my happy place.
- 对不起,那是让我快乐的地方。
Phoebe: Well, ok, fine, use my happy place. Ok, I’m just gonna, I have to ask that you don’t move anything in there.
- -好,我的快乐地方借你用,但别乱动东西。
Monica: All right, I’ll try not to.
- 好,我会试着不乱动。
Phoebe: Ok. All right, so, you’re in a meadow, millions of stars in the sky…Do you think breaking up with him was a huge mistake?
- 好。你在草地上天上有一片繁星。-你觉得分手是错误的吗?
Phoebe: Ok, there are no questions in the happy place. Ok, just, the warm breeze, and the moonlight flowing through the tree…
- 快乐的地方不准问问题。只有和煦的微风和从树上撒下的月光
Monica: I bet he’s totally over me, I’ll bet he’s fine.
- 我赌他一定忘了我,我打赌他好得很。
Phoebe: All right, betting and wagering of any kind, are, I’m sure, not permitted in happy place.
- 快乐的地方,不允许赌博和下注。
Ok. Just-just, you know, the-the lovely waterfalls, and the, the trickling fountains. And the-the calming sounds of the babbling brook…
- 你懂的,那里只有美丽的瀑布、缓慢流动着的喷泉,还有潺潺小溪产生的平静音律
Monica: Ok, this isn’t working. I’m still awake and now I have to pee.
- 好,一点用也没有。我还是醒着的,而且我得去尿尿。
Janice: Guess who?
- 猜猜我是谁?
Joey: Janice. Hi, you just missed Chandler, but uh won’t you come in before you go?
- 珍妮丝。嗨,钱德刚走,但是,你走之前还是进来吧。
Janice: So, I hear, you hate me!
- 我听说,你讨厌我!
Joey: I, ah, I never said hate, I was very careful about that.
- 我,我没说我讨厌你,我可是很小心的。
Janice: A little birdie told me something about you wanting to rip your arm off and throw it at me.
- 有一只小鸟告诉我,你想扯下手臂,丢到我身上。
Joey: And you got ‘hate’ from that? ! You’re thinking a big leap there…All right, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, we have got to do something about our little situation here Joey.
- 这样你就觉得我讨厌你?!你也太断章取义了吧-好吧这种情形,我们得想点策略。
So, this is my idea: you and me spending some quality time together. But what does that gonna do…For Chandler!
- 这是我的主意:你和我花点时间,好好相处。-但是那有什么关-为了钱德!
Joey: Ok. I’m in.
- 好吧,我加入。
Janice: Ok. All right. This is what we’re gonna call it: ‘Joey and Janice’s DAY OF FUN!’
- -好。这就叫做:乔伊和珍妮丝的逍遥一日游!
Joey:* Does it have to be a whole day? Yes, because that’s how long it takes to love me.
- 要一整天啊?-是的,因为这是让你爱上我需要的时间。
Joey: Yeah, I know, I sleep in the next room.
- 是,我知道,我睡在你们的隔壁。
Chandler: So, do you guys all hate Janice too?
- 你们也都讨厌珍妮丝了?
Phoebe: Ooh you hate Janice now? Oh! Joey’s going to be so relieved.
- 你现在讨厌珍妮丝了?哦!乔伊终于可以松一口气了。
Rachel: Oh my God. My God.
- 上帝啊,上帝啊。
Chandler: Oh look everybody…it’s Weepy: The Mime That Cares Too Much.
- 好吧,看,各位这是在哭泣哑剧:太过担心。
Monica: And I went down to the post office, and it turns out it was those videos that I ordered for Richard about the Civil War. He loved the Civil War.
- 我今天去了邮局,寄来的是我订的录影带,是帮理查订的,有关南北战争的。他很喜欢看南北战争。
Phoebe: Monica, do you want us to take you home?
- 莫妮卡,你要不要我们带你回家?
Monica: Uh, huh. Or maybe to a galaxy far, far away.
- 或者带我到遥远的银河去吧。
Ross: Women tell each other everything. Did you know that? Umm, yeah.
- 女人什么事都说。你知道吗?-嗯,是的。
Ross: No Chandler, everything! Like stuff you like, stuff she likes, technique, stamina, girth…
- 不,钱德,我是说全部的事!你喜欢的东西,她喜欢的东西技巧,精力,周长
Chandler: Girth? Why, why, why, wh-why, why, why, why would they do this?
- 周长?为什么?她们为何这样做?
Ross: Rachel says sharing’s great and supposedly, you know, we ought to be doing it. You wanna?
- 瑞秋说分享的感觉很棒,而我们也应该这么做。你想要吗?
Chandler: We’re not gonna talk about girth are we? Nooo! Yeah, ok. Yeah? Yeah! All right! You go first.
- 我们不会要讨论周长吧?-不。-好吧。-好吧?-好!你先吧。
Ross: Ok, ok, I’ll go first. Ok.
- 好,好,我先说。-行。
Ross: So, uh, the other night Rachel and I are in bed talking about fantasies, and I happened to describe a particular Star Wars thing…
- 有天晚上瑞秋和我在床上讨论彼此的性幻想我就形容了一个画面,星球大战里的
Chandler: Princess Leia in gold bikini. Yes!
- 莉亚公主和金色比基尼。-好!
Chandler: I know! Yes! Wow, well, that-that was easy. Ok, you- you go. Ok. Ok.
- 我知道!-这倒挺容易的好,换你了。-好。-好。
Chandler: Ok, well you know, you know when your in bed, with a woman.
- 好,当你跟一个女人在床上,正在亲热。
Ross: Hmph.
- 嗯。
Chandler: And, ah, you know, you’re fooling around with her. And you get all these like, mental images in your brain, you know, like Elle MacPherson, or that girl at the Xerox place…
- 脑袋里突然出现一些疯狂的念头。就像超级名模埃勒麦克弗森,或是影印店的那个女孩
Ross: With the belly button ring? Oh, muhawa!
- 穿了肚脐环的那个?哦!
Chandler: I know, And then all of a sudden your mom pops into your head. And you’re like ‘Mom, get outta here!’
- 我知道,但是突然之间,你忽然想到你妈。然后你就想 “妈,快走开啦!”
You know, but ‘course, like, after that you can’t possibly think of anything else, and you can’t, you know, stop what you’re doing.
- 但从那时起,你的脑袋里就只有你妈,而你正在做的事又不能停止。
So it’s kind of like, you’re, you know. You know…You don’t know!
- 所以你就好像,你知道的,你知道的你不知道!
Ross: Your mom, you’re telling me, you’re telling me, about your mom, what is the matter with you?
- 你妈妈?你是说跟你妈一起?你究竟有什么毛病?
Chandler: You said…Ross: I said ‘share’ not ‘scare’. Go sit over there.
- 你说 -我说要分享,不是吓人。你给我坐到那边去。
Janice: We’re baack!
- 我们回来了!
Joey: Hey…
- -嘿
Chandler: Hey, what are you guys doing together?
- 嘿,你们俩在一起干嘛?
Janice: Joey and Janice’s DAY OF FUN! !
- 乔伊和珍妮丝的逍遥一日游!!
Chandler: Really. Yeah, yeah. We went to a Mets game, we got Chinese food, and, you know, I love this woman. You have got competition buddy.
- 真的吗?-我们去看纽约大都会的比赛,还吃了中国菜,你知道的,我爱这个女人你有竞争对手了,兄弟。
Janice: I just came by to give you a kiss, I have to go pick up the baby, so. I’ll see you later sweetheart, you too Chandler.
- 我只是上来亲你一下,我得去接孩子了,所以。待会儿见,甜心你也是,钱德。
Chandler: You still can’t stand her can you? I’m sorry man, I tried, I really did.
- 你还是受不了她,是吗?-抱歉,我已尽最大努力了。
Chandler: Well, you know, I appreciate you giving it a shot.
- 还是谢谢你的努力。
Joey: But, hey, look, you know, the good thing is, is that we spent the whole day together, and I survived, and what’s even more amazing, so did she. It was bat day at Shea Stadium.
- 但是有一点可喜的是,我们整天在一起,而我还能存活。更了不起的是,她也还活着,因为今天是谢伊球场的“球棒”日。
Chandler: I guess that’s something. Oh man, that’s huge! Now, I know I can stand to be around her, which means I get to hang out with you, which is kinda the whole point, anyway.
- 我想这还蛮了不起的。-天啊,这可是大事呢!现在我知道我可以待在她旁边,表示我可以和你们一起出去,反正这就是我的重点。
Chandler: Ok.
- 好吧。
Joey: Oh, hey, Chandler, we, ah, we stopped by the coffee shop and ran into Ross.
- 哦,嘿,钱德勒,我们在咖啡店停了一下,结果遇到罗斯。
Chandler: Oh God!
- 天啊!
Joey: Hey, if it makes you feel any better, I do it too.
- 希望这会让你好过点,我也会有这种想法。
Chandler: Really?
- 真的吗?
Joey: Oh yeah, I always picture your mom when I’m having sex.
- 对啊,当我在做爱时我都会想像你妈的样子。
Video: April Twelve, Eighteen hundred sixty one, 4:30 A.M. on Tuesday, the United States garrison at Fort Sumter was fired upon it is now under bombardment by…
- 1861年4月12日萨姆特堡的美国要塞遭到炮轰这场炮轰是由于
Monica: Hey, Dad, what are you doing here?
- 嘿,爸,你怎么来了?
Mr. Geller: Well, it’s your mother’s bridge night so I thought that I’d come into the city for a little Monicuddle. Since when did you start smoking cigars?
- 你妈今晚打桥牌,所以我进城来看看小莫妮卡。你什么时候开始抽雪茄了?
Monica: I don’t, I just, I just like the smell of them. So, uh, what are you really doing here Dad?
- 我没有,只是喜欢闻它的味道。你来这里真正的目的是什么?
Mr. Geller: Well, I just wanted to make sure that you are ok.
- 我只想确定一下你还好吧。
Monica: What makes you think that I might not be ok?
- 我为什么会不好呢?
Mr. Geller: I saw Richard.
- 我看到理查了。
Monica: Oh.
- 哦。
Mr. Geller: So, how are you doing?
- 所以,你还好吗?
Monica: I’m fine, just a little tired, but I’m ok. How-how’s Richard doing?
- 我很好,我只是有点累,但我还好。理查怎么样了?
Mr. Geller: You don’t wanna know.
- 你不会想知道的。
Monica: No, I-I really, really do.
- 不,我我真的,很想知道。
Mr. Geller: Well, he’s doing terrible!
- 他的情况很糟!
Monica: Really? !
- 真的?!
Mr. Geller: It’s worse than when he broke up with Barbara.
- 比他失去芭芭拉时还糟。
Monica: You’re not just saying that are you? -Mr. Geller: No, the man is a mess.
- 你不是故意这么说的吧?-不,那个男人简直一团糟。
Monica: Was he crying?
- 他有没有哭?
Mr. Geller: No.
- 没有。
Monica: Well, do you think he was waiting ‘til after you left, so he could cry?
- 你觉得他是否等你走后,才一个人开始哭?
Mr. Geller: Maybe.
- 或许吧。
Monica: I think so.
- 我想是的。
Mr. Geller: Honey, relationships are hard. Like with your mom and me. You know after we graduated from college we broke up for a while.
- -我想也是宝贝,感情这回事很难说,就像我跟你妈大学毕业后,我们曾分手一阵子。
It seems her father, your grandfather, wanted her to travel around Europe, like he did.
- 她父亲,就是你祖父,似乎希望你妈跟他一样,到欧洲四处旅行。
Of course, he got to do it on Uncle Sam’s nickel, because he was also strafing German troop trains at the time. However…
- 当然,他是为了山姆大叔,因为当时他也在猛轰德国的军用运输列车然而
Rachel: Ok, here we go. I’m Jabba’s prisoner, and you, have a really weird look on your face.
- 好吧,开始啰我是贾霸的囚犯,而你脸上的表情好怪。
What? Honey, what is it? Did I get it wrong? Did I get the hair wrong? What? Did you just picture it differently? What? What?
- 怎么了?甜心,有什么问题?我的头发不对吗?还是别的问题?跟你想像的不同,还是?
Ross: No, no it’s, um, it’s not you, um, it’s um, it’s…
- 不,不是你的问题,是
Mrs. Geller: Well what is it? Come on sweetie, your kinda like, freaking me out here.
- 怎么了?拜托,甜心,你快把我吓坏了。
Ross: I hate Chandler, the bastard ruined my life.
- 我恨钱德,那个混蛋毁了我的人生。
第02集
上半部分
Joey: All right they got water, orange juice, and what looks like cider.
- 好,她们有水,柳橙汁,这个看起来像苹果汁。
Chandler: Taste it.
- 喝喝看吧。
Joey: Yep, it’s fat. I drank fat!
- 对,这是一杯油,我喝了油!
Chandler: Yeah, I know, I did that two minutes ago.
- 我知道,两分钟前我才喝过的。
Ross: Hey!
- 嘿!
Chandler: Hey, mister tux!
- 嘿,晚礼服先生!
Ross: Why aren’t you guys dressed?
- 你们怎么还没换衣服?
Joey: We have a half hour.
- 还有半小时。
Ross: No, four minutes ago you had a half hour, we have to be out the door at twenty to eight.
- 不,那是四分钟前的事,我们必须在七点四十出门。
Joey: Relax, Ross, we’ll be ready. It only takes us two minutes to get dressed.
- 放心,我们会准备好的,我们只要两分钟就着装完毕。
Ross: Well, you know, I’d feel a whole lot better if you got dressed now.
- 若你现在就换好,我会高兴点。
Chandler and Joey: Ok.
- 好。
Rachel: Hey-hey! Oh, look at you, all sexy.
- 看看你,多性感啊。
Ross: Really?
- 真的吗?
Rachel: Ooooh! Wow! ! Oh, hi.
- 哦!哇哦!!嘿!
Ross: Hi.
- -嘿!
Rachel: How come you didn’t come over earlier?
- 你怎么不早点过来?
Ross:‘Cause, I’m a stupid, stupid man.
- 因为我真是笨得要命。
Joey: Hey, Ross, want some cider?
- 罗斯,要不要来点苹果汁?
Ross: No. So, um, let’s see you’re pretty close, huh. Make-up’s on, hair’s done.
- 不要,你快准备好了吧。妆化好了,头发梳好了。
Rachel: Yeah, I just have to get dressed.
- 我只要换衣服就好了。
Ross: Yay! And that takes what? Just six or seven minutes?
- 大概只要6或7分钟吧?
Rachel: Yeah! Once I figure out what I’m wearing.
- 是啊,只要我决定好要穿什么。
Joey: Glass of fat?
- 要不要喝点油?
Joey: What’s the matter Ross? What, you’re nervous about your speech?
- 怎么了?你是不是因为要演讲而紧张?
Ross: No! You wanna hear it?
- 不是!你要不要听听看?
Joey: Am I in it?
- 里面有提到我吗?
Ross: Uh, huh. Yeah, right after I thank everyone for giving money to the museum, I sing a song about the wonder that is Joey.
- 等我感谢完所有捐钱给博物馆的人,我就唱一首歌,歌颂乔伊的伟大。
Phoebe: Hello.
- 嘿!
Ross: Hey!
- -嘿!
Joey: Whoa!
- -哇!
Ross: Wow, hello! You look great!
- 嗨,你看起来真棒!
Phoebe: Thank you! I know, though.
- 谢谢你,虽然我已经知道了。
Ross: You see this, this is a person who is ready to go. Phoebe you, oh, you are my star.
- 看到没?这个人准备好,可以出发了。菲比,你…你真是我的偶像啊。
Phoebe: Ohh, well, you’re my lucky penny.
- 那你就是我的幸运铜板。
Chandler: All right, I took the quiz, and it turns out, I do put career before men. Get up.
- 好,我做了测验,结果是我把事业放在比男人重要的位置了。起来。
Joey: What?
- 什么?
Chandler: You’re in my seat.
- 你坐在我的位上。
Joey: How is this your seat?
- 为何这是你的位子?
Chandler:‘Cause I was sitting there.
- 因为我刚才坐在这里。
Joey: But then you left.
- 但是你离开了。
Chandler: Well, it’s not like I went to Spain. I went to the bathroom, you knew I was coming back.
- 拜托,我又不是去西班牙,我是去厕所,你明知道我会回来的。
Joey: What’s the big deal, sit somewhere else.
- 那有什么大不了的,去坐别的地方嘛。
Chandler: The big deal is I was sitting there last, so, that’s my seat.
- 真正大不了的就是我是最后坐在这里的人,所以这是我的位子。
Joey: Well, actually the last place you were sitting was in there. So…
- 事实上,你最后坐的地方是那里,所以
Ross: You guys, you know what, you know what, it doesn’t matter, because you both have to go get dressed before the big vein in my head pops. So…
- 各位,你们知道嘛?那个一点都不重要。你们俩都必须在我脑血管爆掉前换好衣服。所以
Chandler: All right, Ross, I just have to do one thing, really quickly, it’s not a big deal. GET UP! !
- 好的,我只要再做一件事,这真的没什么大不了!起来!!
Monica: Hi. All: Hey.
- 嘿。-嘿。
Monica: Ooh, Phoebe, you look great!
- 哦,菲比,你看起来好美。
Phoebe: All right already.
- 好啦,早知道了。
Monica: Ooh, are you gonna do magic?
- 你要变魔术吗?
Ross: That’s, that’s funny. Change!
- 真好笑,给我换衣服去!
Monica: Hang on a second I just got in.
- 慢点,我才刚进门。
Ross: Look, I don’t care. It starts at eight, we can’t be late.
- 我才不管,晚会八点开始,我们不能迟到。
Phoebe: We could not, would not want to wait.
- 他不能、不会、也不愿等。
Ross: Look, our table is down in front, ok, my boss is gonna be there, everyone will see if we arrive after it starts.
- 我们的桌子在前方,我老板也会在那儿。若晚会开始后我们才进场,大家都看得到。
Monica: Has somebody been drinking my fat?
- 有人喝过我这一杯油吗?
Rachel: You guys, does this look like something the girlfriend of a paleontologist would wear?
- 这像是古生物学家的女友会穿的衣服吗?
Phoebe: I don’t know, you might be the first one.
- 我不知道,你大概是首开先例吧。
Monica: Rach, did you check the machine?
- 瑞秋,你听答录机留言了吗?
Rachel: Uh, no. Wait, you know what, this is the outfit that makes my calves look fat. Never mind.
- 没有。等等,这件衣服会显得我小腿很粗,算了。
Chandler: Well, Joey, I wrote a little song today. It’s called: Get Up.
- 乔伊,我今天写了一首歌歌名叫做“起来”。
Joey: Gee…you know I-I just, I wish there was something I could do to help you.
- 天我希望我可以帮到你什么。
Chandler: Get up! Get up! Get up! Get up! Get up! Get up! Get up! Get up! Get up! Get up!
- 起来!起来!起来!起来!起来!起来!起来!起来!起来!
Joey: All right! All right! You can have the chair.
- 好啦,椅子给你啦。
Chandler: Really?
- 真的?
Joey: Oh my, would you look at that!
- 天啊,你看看这个!
Phoebe: “Hi, it’s me, I’m coming over now.
- 是我,我正要过去。
Hey, what if I’m already there when your playing this message?” Is that too spooky?
- 若你播放这则留言时我已经到了呢?是不是很诡异?
Ross: “Hi Rach, are you there? It’s me, pick up. Rachel. Rach!”
- “瑞秋,你在不在?是我,快接起来。瑞秋?”
Rachel: What? !
- 干嘛?!
Ross: Never mind.
- 没事。
Rachel’s sister: Hi, Rach it’s your sister. Did you ever sleep with Donnie Mazio? ‘Cause last night he kept on shouting ‘Two for two’.
- 嗨,瑞秋,我是你妹妹。你有没有跟丹尼马志奥上过床?昨晚他叫个不停,两个对两个。
Rachel: All right do you want me to get dressed or do you wanna hear a really long story about the senior Hayride?
- 你是想让我去穿衣服,还是听一个关于夜间坐马车出游的长故事?
Joey: Are you only asking him? Cause I…
- 你只问他吗?因为我们也…
Richard: “Monica, it’s Richard. Call me.”
- 莫妮卡,我是理查,打电话给我。
Monica: Is-is-is that message old or new? Old or new? ! Old or new? !
- 这则留言是新的还是旧的?新的还是旧的?
Ross: It’s old, it’s definitely old. Didn’t you hear the, the double beep?
- 绝对是旧的,你没听到两声哔吗?
Monica: What if it’s new?
- 若是新的怎么办?
I mean, we agreed not to talk again, unless we had something really important to say. Shouldn’t I call him back?
- 我们说好不联络的,可能有重要的事,我该不该回电话?
Chandler: Honey, you did call him back. ‘Cause, it’s, it’s really old.
- 甜心,你已经打过了,这是旧的留言。
Ross: Yeah, see Mon, listen, listen.
- 是啊,莫妮卡,你听着。
When Carol and I broke up, I went through the same thing. And you know what I did?
- 当卡萝与我分手时,我也经历一样的事。你知道我怎么做吗?
Monica: Huh?
- 哈?
Ross: I…go…dressed. Really, really quickly. Ok, ok. There we go, there we go.
- 我去换好衣服。真的要快一点,真的。好。这就对了。
Chandler: You know what, ok, fine.
- 你知道吗?好吧。
Don’t get up, you just sit right there. I just hope, you don’t mind, you know, my hand right here.
- 别起来了,就坐在那里吧。只希望你别介意我的手放在这里。
Op, not touching, can’t get mad! Not touching can’t get mad! Not touching, can’t get mad!
- 没碰到,不能生气,没碰到,不能生气!没碰到,不能生气!
Phoebe: Ah! Oh my God! You r-r-rotten boys!
- 我的天啊,你们这些坏孩子!
Chandler and Joey: Sorry Phoebe.
- 抱歉,菲比。
Joey: I’m so sorry.
- -抱歉。
Phoebe: What am I gonna do?
- -我该怎么办?
Ross: No, no, don’t, don’t rub it! Don’t! What gets out hummus? ! What gets out hummus? !
- 别乱抹,有什么可以去除豆泥?有什么可以去除豆泥?
Phoebe: Monica, Monica, you know what gets out hummus.
- 莫妮卡!有什么可以去除豆泥?
Monica: If it is a new message, what is he calling to say?
- 如果那个留言是新的,他到底打来说什么?
Phoebe: Ok, thanks. Yeah, I’ll try that.
- 好,谢谢,我会试试看的。
Chandler: Maybe he’s calling to say you’re obsessive and crazy.
- 说不定他打来说你执迷不悟而且太疯狂。
Monica: So, should I call him back?
- 我该不该回电话给他?
The guys: Noo! NO!
- 不!
Rachel: Ok, do these match?
- 这些搭配吗?
Ross: Yes, they definitely match.
- 是的,很搭配。
Joey: They don’t match.
- 不搭配。
Rachel: Uh!
- -呜!
Joey: What? They didn’t match!
- 干嘛?他们不搭配!
Chandler: All right, fine, you know what, we’ll both sit in the chair.
- 很好,我们一起坐在椅子上。
Joey: Fine with me.
- 随便啊。
Chandler: I’m so comfortable.
- 我好舒服啊。
Joey: Me too. In fact, I think I might be a little too comfortable.
- 我也是,事实上,我可能有点太舒服了。
Chandler: All right!
- -好吧。
Ross: Ok, look, we have nineteen minutes. Ok, Chandler, I want you to go and change! Ok.
- 好,我们有19分钟,钱德,我要你去换衣服。
And then, when you come back, Joey will go change, and he’ll have vacated the chair. Ok?
- 等你回来后,乔伊去换衣服,他就会把椅子空出来。好吗?好的。
Chandler: Ok. All right! Fine! I’m going. But when I get back it’s chair sitting, and I’m the guy who’s…sitting in a chair!
- 好,我要走了。等我回来后这里就是椅子城市,而我是坐在椅子上的那个人!
Rachel: Is this a little too…Pheebs, what happened?
- 这是不是有点太菲比,怎么回事?
Phoebe: Hummus. I got the hummus.
- 我沾到豆泥了。
Rachel: Ooooh! Honey, well we’ll find you something. Do you wanna wear my black jacket?
- 哦!甜心,我们会找出衣服给你,你要不要穿我的黑外套?
Phoebe: That won’t go with this dress though.
- 这样跟裙子就不能搭配了。
Rachel: No, you’re right. Well, we’ll find something. Let’s just get you out of that. Come on.
- 没错。我们会发现一些东西。来吧,我们把衣服换掉。
Ross: No, no, no, no, no, no, not out of that, not out of clothes.
- 不,可别换掉,千万别把衣服脱掉。
Rachel: Mo, Monica, can Phoebe borrow your green dress?
- 莫妮卡,菲比可以借你的绿裙子穿吗?
Monica: I called him. Nooo.
- 我打给他了。-不。
Monica: Yes. Well I got his machine and I left a message. But it’s ok, it’s ok, it’s ok, because you know it was like a casual, breezy message.
- 对,我进入他的答录机,然后我留言了,不过没关系,因为那是个随兴,轻松的留言。
It was breezy! Oh God, what if it wasn’t breezy?
- 很轻松。天啊,若听起来并不轻松该怎么办?
Phoebe: Well, how could it not be breezy, no, ‘cause, you’re, you’re in such a breezy place.
- 怎么可能不轻松?不会,这里是个轻松的地方。
Monica: Here, I got it. I’ll will play my message for you guys, and you can tell me if it’s breezy enough.
- 我知道了,我播放我的留言,你们再告诉我是否轻松。
Joey: But, Monica, how are you gonna do that?
- 你怎么可能那样做?
Monica: I know the code to his answering machine.
- 我知道他答录机的密码。
Ross: Ok, Mon, I really don’t think this is the…Ok, you’re dialing, you are dialing.
- 好,莫妮卡,我不认为现在应该好,你在拨号。
Chandler: What’s going on? Monica’s beeping into Richard’s machine.
- 在干什么?-莫妮卡正在进入理查的答录机。
Chandler: Is she crazy?
- 她疯了吗?
Phoebe: Like a straw? Remember crazy straws?
- 就像稻草记得吗?疯狂的稻草?
Richard: “Hi, this is Richard. Please leave a message at the tone.”
- “嘿,我是理查,请在哔声后留言。”
Machine:“You have two new messages.”
- “你有两个新讯息。”
Joey: Wow, what a cool job. ‘You have two new messages.’ ‘Please, pass the pie.’
- 真是个好工作。“你有两个新讯息”,“请把馅饼递给我”。
Monica: “Hi, it’s Monica. I’m just checking in ‘cause I got this message from you and I didn’t know if it was old or new or what.
- “嘿,我是莫妮卡,我只是想确定一下我有一通留言,不知道是新的还是旧的。
So, I’m just checking. So, let me know, or don’t, whatever. I’m breezy.”
- 所以,我只是问问看。告诉我吧或者不告诉我都可以,我很轻松。”
Joey: Hey, you can’t say you’re breezy, that, that totally negates the breezy.
- 你不能说“我很轻松”,这样就不轻松了。
Woman’s Voice: Hola, it’s me, yesterday was really fun. Call me about this weekend, ok?
- 你好啊,是我,昨天真是愉快。打电话给我谈谈周末的计划,好吗?
Joey: Now she sounded breezy.
- 她听起来就很轻松。
Monica: He’s seeing someone. I can’t believe he’s seeing someone.
- 他开始约会了,我真不敢相信他开始约会。
Phoebe: Monica, you don’t know that. Well, who’s voice was that?
- 你又不知道那个是谁。那么那是谁的声音?
Chandler: Maybe it was his sister’s. You know, maybe it was his daughter’s.
- 说不定是他妹妹的,说不定是他女儿的。
Monica: Michelle! Of course, it was Michelle! Did it sound like Michelle?
- 蜜雪儿,一定是了!听起来像蜜雪儿吗?
Rachel: I-I cannot remember her.
- 我记不清了。
Ross: Great, great. It’s starting to rain, that will make it easier to get a cab.
- 太好了,开始下雨了,这样计程车又更难叫了。
Monica: It was Michelle. Yeah. It was definitely Michelle.
- 是蜜雪儿,绝对是蜜雪儿。
Rachel: Ok, Pheebs, you go with Monica and try on her green dress. If that doesn’t work, you can wear my gray silk one. Oh, God, what was I wearing? !
- 去试穿莫妮卡的绿裙子。不适合,就穿我的灰色丝质的。我要穿那件的。哦,天,我穿啥啊?!
Ross: Well you don’t, you don’t know what you’re wearing?
- 你还不知道自己要穿什么?
Rachel: Well, hon-ey. I’m just trying to look nice for your big night.
- 今晚是你的大日子,我只是希望自己好看一点。
Ross: Yeah, which, which we have to leave for in exactly twelve minutes.
- 是啊,而我们在12分钟内必须出门。
All right, come on, I’ll just pick something out for you. Look there-there that looks good.
- 来吧,我帮你选衣服。那件,那件,看起来很好。
Rachel: Ross, that’s a towel!
- 罗斯,那是毛巾。
Chandler: Ok, you’ll notice that I am fully dressed. I, in turn, have noticed that you are not.
- 你看到了,我全换好了。而我呢,也发现你什么都还没换。
So in the words of A.A.Milne, “Get out of my chair, dillhole!” Ok.
- 所以用米尔恩的话说“离开我的椅子,驴蛋!”-好。
Chandler: What’re you doing?
- 你在干什么?
Joey: Well you said I had to give you the chair, you didn’t say anything about the cushions.
- 你叫我离开椅子啊?你又没说不能带走椅垫!
Chandler: The cushions are the essence of the chair!
- 但椅垫是椅子的精华所在。
Joey: That’s right! I’m taking the essence.
- 没错,我要带走精华。
Chandler: Oh-ho, he’ll be back. Oh-ho, there’s nobody in the room.
- 他会回来的,这里什么人也没有。
Ross: Look, I’m sorry, I thought it looked pretty.
- 对不起,我觉得这样很美。
Rachel: Ross, that was a Halloween costume, unless you would like me to go to this thing as Little Bo Peep.
- 这是万圣节服装。除非你要我穿的像小牧羊女一样。
Ross: Look, I didn’t recognize it without that inflatable sheep.
- 若没有那只可充气的羊,我不会认出来。
Rachel: Yeah, which, by the way Chandler, I would like it back one of these days.
- 是啊,对了,钱德,我最近想要一只回来。
Phoebe: Oh, Rach, good, listen, isn’t this perfect for me!
- 哦,瑞秋,很好啊,这件是不是很适合我?
Rachel: Oh, it’s perfect! But not for tonight.
- 太棒了!但是不适合今晚。
Phoebe: Well, of course not for tonight. Yeah, hi!
- 当然不适合今晚。嘿,嘿!
Ross: Not for tonight. Not for tonight. Notonight! Wh-what, what, what, are you doing?
- 不适合今晚。不适合今晚。不适合今晚!那你在干嘛?
Rachel: No, I’m sorry, we didn’t mean it. I love you, I love you, Breathe.
- 对不起,不是故意的。我爱你,我爱你,深呼吸。
Chandler: We used them as pillows when we went camping.
- 我们去露营时,把它们当枕头。